The police minister and the inspector general are competing to be the comedian of the month since Ali baba and basketmouth have dropped out.
The minister said that police cannot go on strike, have they not done so before and that government will not condone any strike by the police. What will he do please?
The IG said any body that go on strike will be declared persona non grata, I think he needs to look at the meaning and what about if all of them decides to go on strike what will he do?
Friday, January 30, 2009
Banks new marketing strategy
One man's meat is another man's poison. What some people called marketing can be demarketing to other people. Like punch newspaper attribute to a confidential source in Diamond bank 'there was nothing wrong with banks trying to market themselves, adding that in any competitive environment, people operate in different ways to attract customers', I hope Soludo is not reading this.
Ecobank have however claimed she does not care about demarketing since he is an international bank and international banks don't go down, that is a new discovery. Afribank also claimed they are a big bank as if big banks have never crashed in Nigeria and abroad before and who is even deceiving them that they are big.
Ecobank have however claimed she does not care about demarketing since he is an international bank and international banks don't go down, that is a new discovery. Afribank also claimed they are a big bank as if big banks have never crashed in Nigeria and abroad before and who is even deceiving them that they are big.
Oyo state lead in drug haul...NDLEA
According to NDLEA report, the single biggest seizure of drug last year was in Nigeria biggest city Ibadan. 80.54 tonnes of Indian hemp was recovered in two warehouses with a bullion van. We don't know whether the bullion van was being used to move the hemp or the money made from the sales of the hemp.
5,926 of the suspects caught were males while 274 were females, meaning that males are twenty times more likely to carry drugs or ladies are better couriers.
5,926 of the suspects caught were males while 274 were females, meaning that males are twenty times more likely to carry drugs or ladies are better couriers.
Sad Story from Benin
We can't believe the story from Benin that Local government chairmen are claiming they are being forced to paid 10million each per month for poverty alleviation. We agree with the governor that it's a laudable project but we do not think its constitutionally allowed for the state government to force the local government to release such fund. Comrade Adams need to know he is lno onger in NLC.
Congrats however on the resolution of the Ogbemudia car issue. The rumour however is that we are just doing it to appeal to the uromi chief and, what concerns uncle sam that somebody forgot to give Chief Oyegun his own car.
Congrats however on the resolution of the Ogbemudia car issue. The rumour however is that we are just doing it to appeal to the uromi chief and, what concerns uncle sam that somebody forgot to give Chief Oyegun his own car.
Worst in the world, Nigeria stock market finally come first
A report have ranked the Nigerian stock market as the worst in the world for the month of January. We were second in the world by middle of the month.
Business Monitor International which advises foreign investors on where to put their money said: “You could not have done much worse than investing in the Nigerian stock market in 2009.
With the Lagos All-Share Index down 27.5 per cent since January 1, it’s the worst performing equity index in the world so far this year. Add to that a 9.2 per cent drop in the currency, and you are looking at a third of your investment gone in one month, meaning that if you have put a 100 naira at the beginning of January, you probably have only about sixty five naira now.....God will help us.
Business Monitor International which advises foreign investors on where to put their money said: “You could not have done much worse than investing in the Nigerian stock market in 2009.
With the Lagos All-Share Index down 27.5 per cent since January 1, it’s the worst performing equity index in the world so far this year. Add to that a 9.2 per cent drop in the currency, and you are looking at a third of your investment gone in one month, meaning that if you have put a 100 naira at the beginning of January, you probably have only about sixty five naira now.....God will help us.
Why Etim Esin and Jay Okocha are fighting
Two of the best midfielders Nigeria ever produced could not face each other on the football field so they are doing so now on the pages of newspaper and probably will do so in the law court.
Etim Esin have said though he felt bad that they humiliated and embarrassed him by searching him, his car and his wife just because of a stolen phone. He also lied to his daughter that it was a game can you imagine? What is he teaching the small girl? He however said he is going to court because he works for HITV and it wont be good for the image of the station. Please Oga Subair help us beg Bros Etim that your station can cope with the news and that Jay Jay have said he was not around when they started the search, but he stopped it when he discovered there was a search and said that he was sorry.
What does Etim want again, or he might be in court for years and he wont get anything oooo
Etim Esin have said though he felt bad that they humiliated and embarrassed him by searching him, his car and his wife just because of a stolen phone. He also lied to his daughter that it was a game can you imagine? What is he teaching the small girl? He however said he is going to court because he works for HITV and it wont be good for the image of the station. Please Oga Subair help us beg Bros Etim that your station can cope with the news and that Jay Jay have said he was not around when they started the search, but he stopped it when he discovered there was a search and said that he was sorry.
What does Etim want again, or he might be in court for years and he wont get anything oooo
17 Billion fraud in Bank PHB
Thisday carried a rumour about a fraud case before a magistrate court in Abuja involving just 17 billion naira only. We are told that they have recovered 7 billion naira. One of the name of those involved resembled that of the wife of the ace comedian Ali baba who was until recently an ED with the bank. We are told that some smart Alex took advantage of the credit process so we hope the profit PHB is declaring this year will take the 7 billion naira into account by making provision and won't just be Cadbury profit.
Cadbury Profit: When you inflate your profit.
Cadbury Profit: When you inflate your profit.
NECO, WAEC, JAMB etc to change exam date
Researchers have argued over the best time to read for ages, whether morning or evening and also how long. They finally came to the compromise that it's different for everybody and should not be too long.
The president have however brought a new dimension that it's not a best time of the day, but a best time of the year. We are being told that he took his vacation/leave because this is the best time of the year to read. We therefore feel that most examination bodies should take note and change the date for exams so student will be able to read at the best time for these examinations.
The president have however brought a new dimension that it's not a best time of the day, but a best time of the year. We are being told that he took his vacation/leave because this is the best time of the year to read. We therefore feel that most examination bodies should take note and change the date for exams so student will be able to read at the best time for these examinations.
EFCC agent suffer Brigg's Syndrome in court
EFCC surpass the Nigeria police by presenting a witness in court who is suffering from amnesia.
During cross examination by Gboyega Awomolo, Musa Sunday- an EFCC agent first started being evasive, then got confused, finally could not remember anything.
He was not even sure whether Borishade was investigated, who took his statement, etc.
We think EFCC need to send all their agents for medical checkup to confirm they are not suffering from Briggs syndrome.
Briggs syndrome is the disease popularized by the former NIPSS director who was accused of stealing a camera in far away China who in actual fact only FORGOT he picked the camera and FORGOT to return it. Naija amnesia.
During cross examination by Gboyega Awomolo, Musa Sunday- an EFCC agent first started being evasive, then got confused, finally could not remember anything.
He was not even sure whether Borishade was investigated, who took his statement, etc.
We think EFCC need to send all their agents for medical checkup to confirm they are not suffering from Briggs syndrome.
Briggs syndrome is the disease popularized by the former NIPSS director who was accused of stealing a camera in far away China who in actual fact only FORGOT he picked the camera and FORGOT to return it. Naija amnesia.
The joy of being young
It's good to be young. Even Jesus Christ says let the children come unto me.
Babies are allowed to mess up, even shit in there pants. When they do wrong nobody punish them. They can be rude to elders. They can open their mouth and say anything.
Why is somebody thinking of the speaker of the house of Reps. Maybe they feel its because he is young nobody is talking about the inflated prices of cars bought by the house, nobody is surprised they are fighting the senate over co-chairman, only him know we spend 16 billion dollars for power project which is double what everybody else said. He knows civil servants that stole 700 billion naira and suddenly he is at it again - ministers that loss 7 billion dollars.
Its good to be young.....you can say anything
Babies are allowed to mess up, even shit in there pants. When they do wrong nobody punish them. They can be rude to elders. They can open their mouth and say anything.
Why is somebody thinking of the speaker of the house of Reps. Maybe they feel its because he is young nobody is talking about the inflated prices of cars bought by the house, nobody is surprised they are fighting the senate over co-chairman, only him know we spend 16 billion dollars for power project which is double what everybody else said. He knows civil servants that stole 700 billion naira and suddenly he is at it again - ministers that loss 7 billion dollars.
Its good to be young.....you can say anything
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